Henry King features in February's Funeral Service Journal

Henry was asked to take part in '20 Questions' in the February edition of the Funeral Service Journal. If you have a copy, head to page 62 to check it out! Henry said "This is a national journal so it's been nice to receive messages from funeral directors I have met all over the country."

1. What’s the most unusual request you’ve ever had? I am a big advocate for 'unusual requests'. Too often we hear families suggest music choices, followed by 'that isn't funeral appropriate'. Instead, we should be celebrating the individual. The first thought that came to mind was a family who brought two bags to the service: one with scrunched up wrapping paper and the other with pegs. As the service concluded, a wrapping paper throwing fight broke out, as the family did every Christmas. The pegs were used during the reception, to discretely attach a peg to any individual - but don't get caught! 

2. How did you fulfil it? The answer is yes - what's the question?
3. What would you want your funeral to be like? If I was to pass away tomorrow, I would like the full hog. Placed on a gun carriage and pulled through the village by black Frisesian horses. Marching band. Carried into St James the Less Church and left in repose. Heaviest coffin you can imagine. Jerusalem to be sung. And yes, I've already told my partner - pre planning!
4. Burial or cremation? I think cremation. I like the idea that 'land is for the living' and my ashes could be scattered in a memorable place for my family to visit. 
5. What song(s) would you want played at your funeral? I enjoy a vast variety of music genres, but I'd have to choose something by Edward Elgar, with London Grammar thrown in too. ‘Jerusalem’ has to be sung!
6. What attracted you to the funeral sector? My father worked in the industry, so I've grown up with it. I started casual pallbearing with him aged 16, as he didn't want me 'sitting at home on the PlayStation'. My intentions were joining the Royal Air Force, but after acquiring a full-time position aged 18, I enjoyed it that much I decided to stay. Here I am, 15 years later.
7. What’s the one thing you wish you’d known when you started? That you cannot hold onto the information of every funeral you conduct. I would walk down the high street; notice a client and I could tell you everything about the funeral we arranged 2-3 years prior. From music, to coffin, officiant, how many order of service booklets they had, how many limousines they had. It was unhealthy and it affected me mentally. 
8. If you could change one thing about the industry, what would it be and why? Regulation. I take huge pride investing in my facilities, insuring we have the best equipment and care for our families and deceased. 
9. What worries you most about your business? I worry about the mental impact direct cremations are having on families. I'm not saying direct cremation is wrong and nobody should have it, but too often I'm hearing from families 'I want Dad to have a funeral, but he wanted direct cremation'. They're torn between getting the closure that will help in grief, but also respecting their father's wishes. I'm seeing families 12 months later regretting choosing a direct cremation and the realisation of the impact it will have on their mental health. 
10. What is the best part of your job? Hearing 'thank you' from a family. During what is often the most difficult time in someone's life, they take the time to thank you for the service you have provided.
11. What’s the worst? Finding a healthy balance between work and personal life. Working in this industry, we know life is too short. It's important to get that balance right.
12. What three words best describe your life in the funeral sector? Inspiring. Thankful. Legacy.
13. What advice would you give someone joining the sector now? Know your values and stick by them!
14. What’s the worst mistake you’ve ever made? Failing to understand how to run a business. You can be the best funeral director in the county, but if you don't understand business, how good you are becomes irrelevant.
15. What did you learn from it? How to recognise working 'in' the business and 'on' the business. Understanding that makes a huge difference in growth.
16. When and where were you at your happiest? When my son was born. I have a photograph of him being born, and in the same frame is my beaming, smiling face. My face hurts at the thought of how big my smile was. He changed the perspective of life and I will forever be grateful - he's only two and doesn't know it!
17. Who or what has been your biggest influence? My Dad. He believed in me and supported me when I decided to open my office in 2017. He sadly passed away in 2021 and I hope he is proud of the legacy and I continue in his name. I've written a few blogs on my website about him, including when he died. His photographs are proudly displayed in my office.
18. What are you most proud of and why? Proving the haters wrong. I was 23 when I opened my office and I got a lot of stick for it. Larger funeral directors made it difficult for me at the start, but I'm proud of the business I have created.
19. What is your biggest regret? Fiddling with the VCR when my Dad taped WrestleMania in the early 2000s. I didn't believe he had woken up to record it, so I aged around 8-10 I took it upon myself to push buttons, ultimately stopping the recording. I was so upset the following morning that I faked an illness to be off school and borrowed a friend's tape recording!
20. How do you want to be remembered? As a man my son would be proud to call 'dad'.